Betrayal. Rejection. Rebellion. Defiance. All of these words describe the Children of Israel in the Old Testament. Recently when reading through Ezekiel, I came across chapter 16. Admittedly, it’s been a while since I read this book and had forgotten this allegory. It is the Lord bringing a prophetic word to Israel through the prophet, Ezekiel. Let me give you some snippets so you grasp the context.
On the day you were born your cord was not cut, nor were you washed with water to make you clean, nor were you rubbed with salt or wrapped in cloths. 5 No one looked on you with pity or had compassion enough to do any of these things for you. Rather, you were thrown out into the open field, for on the day you were born you were despised.6 “‘Then I passed by and saw you kicking about in your blood, and as you lay there in your blood I said to you, “Live!”[a] 7 I made you grow like a plant of the field. You grew and developed and entered puberty. Your breasts had formed and your hair had grown, yet you were stark naked.8 “‘Later I passed by, and when I looked at you and saw that you were old enough for love, I spread the corner of my garment over you and covered your naked body. I gave you my solemn oath and entered into a covenant with you, declares the Sovereign Lord, and you became mine.9 “‘I bathed you with water and washed the blood from you and put ointments on you. 10 I clothed you with an embroidered dress and put sandals of fine leather on you. I dressed you in fine linen and covered you with costly garments. 11 I adorned you with jewelry: I put bracelets on your arms and a necklace around your neck, 12 and I put a ring on your nose, earrings on your ears and a beautiful crown on your head. 13 So you were adorned with gold and silver; your clothes were of fine linen and costly fabric and embroidered cloth. Your food was honey, olive oil and the finest flour. You became very beautiful and rose to be a queen. 14 And your fame spread among the nations on account of your beauty, because the splendor I had given you made your beauty perfect, declares the Sovereign Lord.15 “‘But you trusted in your beauty and used your fame to become a prostitute. You lavished your favors on anyone who passed by and your beauty became his. 16 You took some of your garments to make gaudy high places, where you carried on your prostitution. You went to him, and he possessed your beauty.[b] 17 You also took the fine jewelry I gave you, the jewelry made of my gold and silver, and you made for yourself male idols and engaged in prostitution with them. 18 And you took your embroidered clothes to put on them, and you offered my oil and incense before them. 19 Also the food I provided for you—the flour, olive oil and honey I gave you to eat—you offered as fragrant incense before them. That is what happened, declares the Sovereign Lord.20 “‘And you took your sons and daughters whom you bore to me and sacrificed them as food to the idols. Was your prostitution not enough? 21 You slaughtered my children and sacrificed them to the idols. 22 In all your detestable practices and your prostitution you did not remember the days of your youth, when you were naked and bare, kicking about in your blood...34 So in your prostitution you are the opposite of others; no one runs after you for your favors. You are the very opposite, for you give payment and none is given to you.
As I read this, a gamut of thoughts and emotions arise. If I read it from the role of a spouse, I feel betrayal and rejection. If I read it from the role of a parent, I experience rebellion, defiance, and the feeling of being used. Both roles leave me in anguish and grief. As a spouse, to have that which I entered into be thrown away or used against me is agonizing. As a parent, that which I sacrificed and poured out being take for granted leaves me brokenhearted. Yet, there’s another role I need to put myself in to experience the fullness of God’s heart in this: that of the prodigal and prostitute.
But I would never do the things written,” I cry, “so why would I try to perceive that role?
Oh, but how I do! In a physical sense, I’ve never personally come close to living the lifestyle described, and yet, in my heart I’ve gone “whoring” many times. Many times, I’ve found myself not valuing the work of Christ, making light of it, and not upholding faithfulness in my heart as a part of my covenant. When He comes close to be intimate, I have pulled away to other distractions and pseudo-lovers. I’ve found myself sacrificing the good things he has lavished on me for a cheap imitation of fulfillment. It was oftentimes me who pursued those things at my own expense – not because I was offered anything in return.
Many times, I’ve found myself taking the goodness, grace, and love of the Father for granted, trusting it will be there if and when I need or want it. I’ve not seen myself from the place of helplessness that I once was – but rather self-sufficiency. I’ve given way to an adolescent soul which promotes instant gratification and living for pleasure. All I can say is, I feel God’s heart of grief when I read this.
Search me and know my heart, Lord. Lead me in the way everlasting. May I abandon the heart of a prodigal and a prostitute. May I be wholly devoted to my covenant with you.